Category Family

Jul 14 2011

Dear Granddaddy,

On Sunday, July 10, 2011, my Granddaddy Widick passed from this earth.  I had the daunting task of being one who would officiate at his funeral.  Below are the words I shared with the crowd gathered.  These words were from the perspective of his 7 grandchildren, written in letter form to the greatest Granddaddy in the world.

Dear Granddaddy,

I hope that all of us have made you proud.  You worked so hard to get this family started.  We know that you loved us all so very much.

I have a few confessions to make.  First, one day when I was very little, I walked down into your basement and was playing around with some of your tools on your massive workbench.  I found an oil can.  I had never seen one like this.  It looked like the one Dorothy used on the tin man in the “Wizard of Oz”.  I grabbed it and pretended everything down stairs was the tin man, and gave it a good oiling.  Sorry about the mess, but at least nothing squeaked anymore.

I also would always forget to turn the shop light off in your basement.  I was always fascinated by the pull string that had the doughnut shaped ring to it.  You could always see if the light was left on or not by looking down through the vent next to your chair in the den.

I know we all as grandchildren loved you very much.  We want to thank you.  Thank you for letting us play and hang out with you in your basement.  We were always fascinated by it.  I can vividly remember everything about the basement you were so proud of at the house on Darden.  Walking in to your little office, where you had your small sofa, a little 13 inch television set (which you got as a Christmas Present one year from your children), one of 4000 puzzles laid out that you were always working on, and your pipe.  OH, how you always smelled so special with that pipe smell.    I remember a small black and gold radio you had on a shelf behind the couch.  I remember finding reasons to go and wash my hands in your special little sink in the basement.  The water was always ice cold.

We were always impressed by the enormous collection of aluminum cans as we would go up the stairs.  We were also always fascinated by all the different and unique knick knacks you would keep in the unfinished ceiling of the basement.  I think each of us found something new everytime we looked.

There wasn’t a time we remember when we didn’t look at your birthmarks on your arm.  We’re sorry, but we were so impressed!  You also always had ink stains on your hands from working so hard to provide for us.  I know you had to be exhausted after you would get home from work, but whenever you came home when we would spend the night with you, you always took time for us.  We don’t recall you ever being too tired to get down on the floor with us and play.  Even in your last days, we saw you playing with our own children, loving them and holding them dearly, being so proud to be a great granddaddy.

You got us back though, for all the times we aggravated you.  Every time you saw one of us you would come up to us and do one of a few things:

You would grab our arm, and squeeze right between our muscle and our bone.  It wouldn’t hurt, but it didn’t feel good.  You also had the ability to grab that tender spot just above our knee when we would sit beside you, and squeeze just hard enough.  You also loved to count all of our ribs, and you would get us all as you tickled us.

However, all those things were just in fun.  We know you loved to pick on us.  But you also showed us your love in the simplest things.  You would always hand crank the best ice cream out on the deck.  From the wonderfully thick and sweet chocolate ice cream to perfect as could be peach ice cream, you knew just how many times to crank that ice cream.  As Jackson put it last night to me, I don’t think anyone else was strong enough to do it but you.

John 14:1-4 Jesus tells us not to let our hearts be troubled. If we believe in God; believe also in Jesus. His Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would he have told us that He was going there to prepare a place for us? And if he is going and preparing a place for us, he will come back and take us to be with Him that we also may be where He is.  We know the way to the place where He is going.

There’s one problem with this verse, granddady.  Some of our fondest memories of being with you were in the back yard, sitting on the cedar swing with you, walking around the yard looking at your plants and flowers, and most importantly – the annual Easter Egg hunt.  You would walk around and help each of your grandchildren find the eggs that were hidden a little tougher than they should have been.

We know you’ve moved on.  But the problem is you probably don’t care too much about the room Jesus prepared for you.  You probably care more about the backyard.  We know you’ve probably already started a garden at the home Jesus prepared for you. You’re probably even giving Jesus tips on how to make flowers and tomatoes grow a little fuller and a little riper.

Our memories of you will forever live in our hearts.  Yesterday, as we gathered as a family in this room before guests started to arrive to honor you, I was reminded of the great legacy that you have to your name.  I looked around and was reminded of God’s word to Abraham when he promised him that he would become a great nation – We are a great nation as a family devoted to God, all because of the care and kindness of this wonderful man.

Indeed, each of the grandkids heard you threaten with the phrase “You see that ‘mean’ in my eye?  I know I would try to find it, but would never succeed in seeing it.  None of us ever could.  Admit it granddaddy, there was no mean in your eye, only love.  But granddaddy, do you see that tear in my eye?  Its real, and its there because you’re gone.

May we all walk daily in the footsteps of Jesus as you did.  May we all be the examples to our own families as you always were to us.  May we find comfort in knowing you’re with a Savior who always walked with you.  May we continue to live out the legacy you began for this Widick family.  We know we will see you again one day, and can’t wait to see what kind of backyard you will have grown using that heavenly soil.

May 27 2011

For Josie, on her 3rd birthday

For three years, I have had the pleasure of knowing the most wonderful little girl in the world.    On May 27, 2008, Josie Layne Widick was born into this world at Crestwood Hospital in Huntsville, Alabama.  My life changed that day, and every day since, I have been overwhelmed with the joy of being a father.

Fun facts about Josie:

-Her favorite color is pink
-Her favorite shows are Little Bear and Dora the Explorer (but also loves the Wonder Pets, Olivia, Ni Hao Kai Lan, and Super Why)
-She loves to show people how to do jumping jacks
-Her favorite songs are Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and her ABCs
-She can spell and write her own name!
-She loves to play with her baby dolls
-She sleeps in a big girl bed
-She is very particular about things, everything has to be in order
-Her favorite meal is chicken nuggets, strawberries and maybe some carrots
-She loves chocolate milk and apple juice
-She misses her family in Tennessee and Alabama dearly and talks about them often
-Her favorite game is Hi Ho Cherry O
-She loves to go to church and go to class!

Today, we celebrated by going to the Houston Children’s Museum with Grandmommy and Granddaddy.  Below are some pictures of the day!  (Tomorrow, we celebrate with friends as well)

Driving at the museum!

Josie fishing!

Playing at "Flow Works" outside at the Museum. It was 94 degrees today!

Mommy and Josie looking at the baby chicks.

Josie's favorite part of the museum was the market place where she could go shopping!

Josie serving up some diner food at the museum to Grandmommy and Granddaddy

Josie's new baby bed from Nana and Papa

A raincoat and umbrella she got for her birthday. She insisted it was raining in the house and didn't want to take it off!

By lanewidick • Posted in Family
0
May 24 2011

A Gift for the Mrs.

In case you weren’t aware, my wife and I about a year ago, after being dedicated Dave Ramsey listeners, proudly became Debt Free.  One of the hardest things about being debt free is remaining debt free.  Its so tempting at times to justify things, saying “we’re debt free, so let’s go ahead and get it”.  However, then you remember how much freedom there is in being debt free, and you remember how your goal is to continue to be that way, and it makes decisions a lot easier.

Again, I’m not bashing anyone who is not debt free.  We aren’t officially debt free, because we do still have a mortgage.  However, aside from that we owe nothing to anyone!  I want to encourage all of you who think that debt is a way of life, to rethink that idea.  Being a minister for all of my adult life, I have not brought in a ton of money.  I feel we live a very modest life style.  We don’t have a lot of luxuries.

So, when it came time this past week to look for a new car for Kristen, we had a lot of things to think about.  We have enough money to get a car payment and it not break our backs completely.  We would have been able to get a newer car with less miles.  But it would have completely nullified all we had worked towards.  We had been setting aside money knowing this day was coming.  We got a decent offer for our trade in, and we put cash towards the new car, and walked out of the dealer with a 2005 Toyota Highlander with 72,000 miles on it.

We’ve always liked the Highlanders.  The new models are very attractive.  However, we knew that we didn’t have $30,000 to buy one, nor did we want to pay $300 a month towards something for 5-6 years.  So we settled on a much cheaper vehicle.

No, its not new.  No, its not as shiny.  But its an upgrade from the 04 CRV.  And most of all, my wife is ECSTATIC!!  I really want to encourage everyone to aim for a debt free life!  YOU CAN DO IT!!  I know you can!

Here’s a picture of Josie and Kristen with the new ride:

Kristen and Josie modeling in front of her "new" car!!

May 14 2011

For Marty, my brother, on his birthday

From left to right, Penny, Marty and me outside his home in Memphis TN back in the early 90s.

Its hard to really get close to a sibling when there is an 8 year age difference.  Marty, my oldest sibling, and oldest of three children in the family, was born on May 15, 1970.  This year will mark him turning 42 years old.  He has three children, and is married to Penny.

Marty is the reason I am an Alabama fan.  He’s one of the reasons I went to Freed Hardeman University.  He’s one of the reasons that I’m a Huey Lewis and the News, Bruce Hornsby and the Range, and Nylons fan.

When I was younger, I thought Marty was one of the coolest people in the world.  He had cool friends, did cool things, and was someone to look up to.  I remember when my brother became a Christian, and even though I wasn’t ready, it made me think hard about my life in Christ.  My brother and I shared a room for about a year in 1985 while my parents built the house they currently live in.

Marty was given a 1957 Chevy to drive when he turned 16.  Our Grandfather Smith found it for him, and Marty drove it like it was the coolest car in the world.  In reality, it was the ugliest thing ever, but I didn’t know that then.  I just thought it was awesome.  If memory serves me correct, it was a 3 speed, had huge dents in it, and I believe Marty tried to fill some of the patches with bondo but never had the money to paint it.

My brother, Marty. Roll Tide!

Marty gave us a scare a few years ago when he was 36.  He has, for the longest time, struggled with sleep apnea.  It finally caught up to him and he had a heart attack followed by open heart surgery.  Thank goodness he made it through that time, and is healthy and living life to its fullest now.  He even rides a scooter now!

For the longest time now, I’ve called my brother a goober, but I mean that in the nicest way possible.  I often think he’s stuck in the 80s, loving his old music.  However, he has a heart of gold, would do anything for you if you asked him, and he finds the simple things in life make him happiest.  To my brother, I wish you a happy birthday.  May God continue to bless you with many more, and may he bless your family as well.

By lanewidick • Posted in Family
0
Feb 22 2011

Bieber Fever? A Confession…

I’m a fan of Justin Bieber.  There, I got that out of the way.

But, I’ve never once listened to any of his music.  I’ve never read any lyrics to his songs.  I couldn’t tell you the name of one his songs.  But I’m a big fan.

I know I may get ridiculed for having “Bieber Fever”, but I really don’t care.  The kid is just awesome.

In a society of teen pop culture icons, its good to see that so far, one of them has kept their head on straight.  After seeing the downfalls of so many going from child star to young adult inmate, its refreshing to see that Justin, to this point, has not met that demise.  I hope that he won’t ever fall from where he is right now.

Recently on Extreme Home Makeover, Justin Bieber was a guest star in support of a family who lost their daughter to texting while driving.  You can read more about that episode by clicking HERE. That night, he had a concert and invited the younger sister of the victim to be his guest of honor.  Being a young teenager, she was thrilled, and got to bring along several friends.  She had a private pre concert party with Bieber, and then Justin told her that $1 from every ticket sold that night was going to help their cause of stopping teens from texting and driving.  It was that night I became intrigued as to how such a young guy could have such a big heart.  Since then I have found out about several other things he does to help out.

Last summer, Bieber gave a sizable donation to victims of the Nashville Floods.  He speaks out against bullying in school.  He donates to the Children’s Miracle Network.  $1 from every ticket sale to all of his concerts goes to Pencils of Promise, an organization that builds schools for third world countries.  A simple google search will reveal many charities he helps out with, and he seems to be always looking for a way to help.

As a parent of a young child, I hope that future child and teen stars can look to him as a way to get it right.  I know he was raised right.  Recently, Bieber’s mom issued a public prayer request to ask all his fans to pray that he would continue in the ways he seems to be headed, and not be influenced in a negative way by his fame and fortune.

May 10 2010

All I Can Do

Sometimes, all I can do is pray.

And today is one of those days. I can’t really tell you why, but today is filled with much prayer. For me, for my wife, for my daughter, and several other key people in my life.

Nothing is wrong. I’m not making a major change in my life. I’m not getting out of ministry. If anything, after last week at Pepperdine and their lectures, I’m more inspired and rejuvinated in my ministry efforts. Getting OUT of ministry is indeed the last thing on my mind at the time.

No one is sick, at least no one in my immediate family. Sure there are sick people that I am praying for, but I am confident God has them under His loving care.

God, in His infinite wisdom, created us with a need to have relationships, both with Him and with others. Recently, I have learned what it is like to be alone. Even though it was on just a temporary basis, I realized that I have come a long way in my life. Back in 2001-2003 I lived alone. I was a bachelor in Houston TX, doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. I didn’t have any restrictions in my life. If I wanted to go to McDonald’s at 2 a.m., I could have done so. If I wanted to go on vacation over the weekend to Mt. Rushmore, I could have.

But you could not pay me any sum of money to go back to that life. Sure, it was fun. Yes, I cherish those times with the students and friends and teachers in my life.

However, there were 2 key components missing in my life at that time. God, and my family.

Okay, let me rephrase that. God wasn’t missing. God was and is always there for me. I just treated him as an afterthought. I went through the motions. God was a part of my life, but was not my life. I didn’t think of Him much outside of my lesson plans to teach Bible, putting together chapel for Westbury, or the trips to the church building. At that time of my life, God was just there, and that was about it.

The other key component missing was my wife, and now here recently I have learned – my daughter, Josie. Sure, I had friends there, and my day was occupied by my students, but I had no real relationships. I bounced around from group to group, never allowing myself to get too terrbily close to anyone.

Fast forward a few years to present day. I think God puts us in our own personal deserts at certain times, so we will be forced to take a step in a different direction, hopefully being towards Him. My steps toward having a closer, more intimate relationship with God, came about as a result from the other relationship in my life – Kristen. To take it a step further, it went even farther when Josie came along.

Being forced to be by myself this past week caused me to gravitate towards God a bit more. Its amazing how it really is true that when you shut up for a bit, and allow God to speak, that He actually has some really good things to say.

And now, all I can do is pray, for without prayer, I do not have God in my life. Without God in my life, all other relationships I have just don’t mean as much. Without God in my life, my career, my lifestyle, my passion and drive is gone. Without God, the miracle of my daughter being born into my life disappears. Without God, there would be nothing, so all I can do is pray, and let him be a part of my life.

And I pray that you will allow Him to be part of yours as well. All I can do is pray that you will see that. All I can do for you is pray. All that I am, all that I have, all that I will be is because of Him.

Apr 17 2010

Me and My Girl

My little gal in the Texas Bluebonnets

Me and Josie at the zoo in front of the "Zehbrahs"

We were looking at the elephants

Mar 5 2010

Friday is always Friday, No Matter What

No matter what, you can’t take Friday away from me.

For the past 9 years or so, I never took a regular day off from work, except on Saturdays.  Every church I’ve worked for has allowed me to take one day off during the week, plus Saturday.  I never routinely took my day off.  Sometimes, I would just come home early from a day at the office, but I never really did much of that.  If Kristen was working, what was I going to do with my day off?

Since coming to Houston, I have realized the value of a day off.  Most of us on staff take Fridays off, and it has really helped make it feel like what a weekend used to be like.  I take Friday and Saturday off, but its back to work on Sunday.  Well, really I usually end up with something to do with church on the weekend also, but I don’t mind, so long as I get my day off on Friday.

It has really helped rejuvenate my spirit.  It has helped me refocus my attention.  It gives me much needed rest.  I go to the gym and get an extra long weight session in for the week.  I get to do some things around the house.  I have time to pray, meditate, and sometimes fast.  I have a chance to listen to God.  It has given me so much.

You know, God rested.  It doesn’t always make sense that God rested.  I mean, He is God.  He created rest.  I can’t entirely comprehend it.  However, its kind of neat to think about our God, taking it easy for a day.  Don’t get me wrong, God never stops loving, working, creating…but I’m sure He still takes a breather every now and then.  If for no other reason, its to stop and look at his creation, maybe re-evaluate it, relish in it, soak it in, or cry over it.

Ecclesiastes tells us to seize every moment we have.  How will you seize today?  How will you relish in the day that God has given to you?  May God bless all of us this weekend.

Nov 24 2009

T-Giving time.

In an effort not to go a week without posting, I thought I would update everyone on what’s going on for the Holidays.  Being 900 miles away from family makes it harder, but not impossible, to get together for the holidays.

On Wednesday, we will load up in the family CRV and drive about 8 hours to Gulf Shores, AL.  We will be meeting Kristen’s parents, and her sister and brother in law for Thanksgiving there.  We will stay there till Saturday, and then return home for services on Sunday at church, and a day of rest before the week starts again.

While I’m not looking forward to a an 8 hour drive with an 18 month old child in the back, I am looking forward to getting away from the big city and having a day or so to enjoy time with my wife and baby girl at the beach.

So at this time of Thanksgiving, I give thanks for another year with Josie and Kristen, a good job with a great church family, and so many other things I can’t list because I just don’t have the time.  I will get back to the final few chapters of the book review soon.  Until then, Happy Thanksgiving, be careful on Black Friday,  and I look forward to Cyber Monday, where the real deals can be had.  God bless us all.

Nov 9 2009

Establishing the Wrong Role for the Pastor’s Family – Chapter 2

Continuing in our review of the book “10 Stupid Things That Keep Churches From Growing”, we look at chapter 2 – “Establishing the Wrong Role for the Pastor’s Family”.

In my career as a minister, I’ve heard it said every time during an interview, whether jokingly or not, that the church hoped to get a “Two for one” special with my wife.  Sadly, there are many churches that expect the family of a minister to have as big a role in the their ministry as the minister himself.  It is not the job of my family to preach, teach, clean up, set up, organize, follow through, establish, maintain, or anything else with the church.  Their place in ministry should be strictly voluntary, and not mandatory.

Too often times, a minister’s wife has a full time job, and then will teach a class, sing on a praise team, work in the nursery, and host a fellowship meal all on the same Sunday.  It has gotten to the point where we have set priorities in our family.  My wife will not teach on both Sundays and Wednesdays.  In fact, she has taken over the responsibility as the ministry leader for our Women’s Ministry.  While my wife loves working with children, and has a degree and experience in that field, that role is filled with a Children’s Minister at our congregation.  She has found a different way to serve.  But that was her decision.

I’ve known many ministers who have lost their families due to an unnecessary amount of stress placed on the family.  This may not be on an actual role for the family, but for the minister himself.   The role in that situation is that the Family assume the role of second place.  That could be even worse than expecting the family to do extra things for the church.

I think the role of “Minister’s Wife” or “Pastor’s Wife” could be one of the most challenging roles in the world.  We as ministers need to realize all the stress they go through.  As a worship minister, I do not get to sit with my family hardly ever on Sunday mornings during the service.  We’ve tried, but our daughter is at a point where she needs to be close to a door to be taken out at any moment.  My wife does so much on Sunday morning, but there’s little we can do to change our situation.

So, my wife selflessly gives of herself for my ministry on Sunday morning.  However, I know I’m one of the lucky ones.  My wife knew what she was getting into, and accepts that there will be times like this.  My prayer is that churches and ministers alike will understand that it is all too easy to just assume that the minister’s family is at their disposal.  God established the family before the church was ever established.  Let us never forget how important our families are in our ministry.